Mental health advocate Onyango Otieno has narrated a horrifying experience of how he was raped by their house help at the age 20.
He says he was so traumatised and it has taken him 10 years to open up about it.
I WAS RAPED BY OUR HOUSE MANAGER WHEN I WAS 20. IT WAS MY FIRST SEXUAL EXPERIENCE. THAT SHIT MESSED ME UP ON TOP OF THE CHILDHOOD TRAUMA I ALREADY HAD. IT’S TAKEN ME 10YRS TO TALK ABOUT IT. COULDN’T EVEN WRITE IT IN MY JOURNALS. BOYS, WE WERE NEVER TAUGHT TO SPEAK ABOUT OUR PAIN,’ HE TWEETED.
Adding,
“SO MANY BOYS AND MEN UNDERGO SEXUAL ABUSE AND IT’S TOUGH ON THEM TO SPEAK UP BECAUSE THEY WERE NOT TAUGHT THE MECHANISM OF HEALTHY EXPRESSION ABOUT THEIR PAIN. THIS EXPLAINS A LOT OF HIGH RATES OF MALE SUICIDE AND TRAUMA. AND IT’S MULTIFACETED.”
Otieno’s post saw many share their stories of how they were sexually abused by their house helps.
Marutit Kemboi wrote,
I UNDERWENT THE SAME ORDEAL WHEN I WAS JUST 6 YEARS OLD IN CLASS ONE. I USED TO REMAIN WITH HER MOST OF THE TIME. SHE MADE ME DO DESPICABLE THINGS THAT THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I AM SAYING IT. ITS TOUGH GROWING UP AS AN AFRICAN MAN. WE CAN’T TALK AND IF WE DO NONE UNDERSTANDS.
Tetey wrote,
WHEN I WAS 5 YEARS OLD MY MUM LEFT US WITH A NEIGHBOR TO GO DELIVER OUR THIRD BORN. THE GIRL FROM THAT HOME DUPED ME TO SLEEP WITH HER (RAPE). PRIOR TO THIS, A HOUSE HELP HAD RAPED ME. ONE TIME I TRIED TELLING MY MUM, SHE STARTED CRYING STATING THAT I AM BLAMING HER FOR NEGLECT. I WASN’T ABLE TO OPEN UP TO HER COMPLETELY. HAVE NEVER RAISED THESE CONCERNS TO ANYONE. BUT THE ISSUES OF BOYS BEING SEXUALLY MOLESTED BY HOUSE HELPS IS REAL. HOPE PARENTS ARE MORE VIGILANT ABOUT IT. IT CREATES SCARS THAT ARE HARD TO HEAL.
Check out more reactions;
Julie Gichuru I am so sorry for your pain. Our sons need to be heard, they need protection. Wishing you healing @Rixpoet 🙏
True North You are no longer a slave to your trauma. Thank you for generosity. We continue to cheer you on as you work towards your healing.
Nelie Olivier 💔 💔 💔 no words can ever fix whar happened to you. I am truly saddened. Being a Voice for men and boys can help others not to accept any evil
Kirowo Barungi This has inspired most of men masculinity if proper research is undertaken you will note that such acts has led to many run away dad and many being locked in jail.
Michel Chaz Caleb .sorry for that bro. . .you’ll heal. . .we need a safe space as men to talk about being abused. . .it happened to me when I was younger but it didn’t register until I was older. . .still have scars but I don’t blame myself anymore and focusing on being a better person. .
Edwin Kariuki Every time a boy child is hurt or abused he is told ‘take it like a man’ men don’t cry, men don’t complain so we take like a man, that shit kills us slowly we can’t even talk because we take it like a man. I am teaching my boy to cry when necessary we are not robots.